In daily life, one of the reasons why couples often quarrel may be that their significant other has a very close opposite-sex friend, who may have grown up together or is a classmate. But it is certain that this opposite-sex friend knew your significant other earlier than you, and may even understand him better than you.
This “female confidant” and “male confidant” often make the significant other feel deeply uneasy. The so-called “pure friendship relationship” is questioned due to the physiological and psychological differences between the two sexes. Of course, if both parties stay firmly in the friend zone and there is no ambiguous physical contact even if their relationship is very good, then the claim of “we are just friends” is not sophistry but an established fact.
The problem is that feelings are variable. Today’s friendship may be tomorrow’s love. If you are still hovering between friendship and love, you might as well see if you have the following signs and examine whether you have fallen in love with your good friend.
Regard the other person as a spiritual pillar.
If you think of him first when you encounter difficulties and can’t wait to share interesting things with him when you see them; when eight or nine out of ten things in your life are related to him, this is a warning sign: it’s time to adjust your mindset properly.
Ask yourself, are you too dependent on this person? This is not what a “good friend” would do!
Suddenly have a flutter in a certain moment.
Many people think that there is no pure friendship between men and women because the so-called “good friend” or “bestie” becomes close because of having a good impression. So there is more or less an ambiguous element.
If you feel a flutter for your good friend or bestie at a certain moment and even have feelings beyond friendship, then it means you are no longer looking at the other person with a friend’s attitude.
Compare the other person with other opposite-sex friends.
One of the reasons why two people can become good friends is that you must see many advantages in the other person, which may be something you don’t have or something you admire very much. This is a perfectly normal thing!
However, if you start to compare him with other opposite-sex friends and feel that your good friend is much better than others, this is very likely a dangerous signal of “more than friends”.
Be jealous of the other person’s opposite-sex friends.
Sometimes when a good friend around you is very close to others, it may cause jealousy. This has nothing to do with gender. It may just be caused by a “sense of deprivation”.
But if you start to care if your good friend has an opposite-sex friend who is closer than you and even compare yourself with the other person, perhaps you should seriously think about whether you have quietly developed love and produced possessiveness?
Fantasize about having intimate actions with the other person.
This needs no further explanation, right? You can’t go back to a simple friendship!
If you want to hold hands, hug, kiss, or even have the urge to have sex with the other person, there is no doubt that you have been attracted to him and your feelings have already escalated from good feelings to love. Next, it depends on whether you want to take the initiative to confess and pierce through that layer of paper of friendship!
If you really think the other person is more suitable to be a lover, you might as well take the first step bravely! Maybe in the end it will be a happy ending like Li Daren and Cheng Youqing in the classic Taiwanese drama “In Time with You” ❤️
